Children and Grief
"All too often, children are the forgotten grievers…”
Mary Keane, RN, MA, OCN
First Executive Director
Mary’s Place
Someone has said, “If children are old enough to love, they’re old enough to grieve.” It is after all, because we love someone, that we grieve for them when they’re no longer here.
Funeral directors are aware of this and take special care in showing sensitivity to children.
As for the funeral home’s role, most counselors agree that children should be allowed to choose if they want to attend the services and if they want to participate in some way, and that they need to be informed about what will happen and what to expect in order to make a good decision. Your funeral director can help in kindly explaining this to them, if you would like them to.
Also many funeral homes have a children’s corner or room for use during visiting hours or services. It usually includes toys, books, games, and stuffed animals for their comfort and enjoyment.
Most funeral homes have free booklets about talking to children about death that may be helpful to you. There are many websites and organizations that specialize in helping children in grief. Some of them are these:
- www.pbs.org/wnet/onourownterms/articles/children.html has good information about talking to children about death.
- www.childrensgrief.net has helpful information about helping children when a traumatic death is involved.
- www.compassionatefriends.org has information not only about the death of a child, but how children grieve the loss of another child.
If you would like additional information or have any questions or comments, please do not hesitate to ask your funeral director or email us.
These websites are listed for your convenience. We are not associated with them in any way and are not responsible for their content.